Tues. Dec. 23, 2014

I am feeling so much better about things, for a couple of reasons.  First, I have had more time to digest the information about my treatment plan; I've had time to think about it.  I've had time to talk about it---it sounds weird, but somehow talking about it out loud to someone seems to be like hitting a "reset" button in my head, and it helps me to make sense of things and work through them.

I was already feeling a lot better about things, and then on Saturday, we went to the temple. Long story shorter, we went with my husband's family.  His mother is not well, and several of the family members were able to come to be with her in the temple for probably the last time.  It was an absolutely beautiful, spiritual experience that I will treasure always.  But when I left, I understood more of the purpose of trials, and I was reminded (again) that Heavenly Father is in charge.  Of course, I already knew this in my head, but I was just having trouble letting go of the fear.  But that experience changed that, and I'm at peace now.  It feels great!

I go back to the radiation oncologist today--will ask the questions I have for him.  Then my long list of questions for the other oncologist when I go back to him in a few weeks.

Merry Christmas, everyone!  I'm so thankful for my Savior; He has carried me this year.