Tues. July 1, 2014
Well, tomorrow is my 3rd cycle.  I've ENJOYED (I can't even tell you how much I've enjoyed) these last two weeks.  We haven't done anything remarkable as a family . . . it's summer (my husband's busiest season of the year) and my oldest two kids are working this summer, so going anywhere is enough extra stress that it is questionable if it's even worth it!  But, I've had a lot of family in town and we have spent some time together.  Today we went to the park with a picnic lunch, and took the kids my daughter is babysitting with us, and met my sister and her kids there.  We really did have a good time!  It's sunny, and the weather is perfect . . . not too hot, not too cool.  Beautiful weather, beautiful place.  What more could I ask for?

I have tried hard to prepare mentally and emotionally for another treatment, and I've found that I really don't know how to prepare.  Thus, I find myself hoping I'm prepared, but not knowing for sure.  My sister had a "surprise" that she told me . . . (I'm so glad she did!)  She said she was thinking about having a party for me after this next treatment to celebrate being 1/2 way through my chemo.  I don't know if it will all come together or not (if my family reads this, no pressure, really) but either way, it has given me something positive to look forward to.

One of the things I've learned this time around is how to enjoy the little moments . . . to enjoy the journey.  By nature, I'm wound pretty tight, and have spent a lot of time in my life being really stressed out about things that really don't matter in the long run.  But at the time, even if I knew that it didn't matter, I still stressed about them; I just couldn't figure out how to "let go."  Learning to enjoy the journey has been a long, slow process, and it's not complete yet.  But this has sure pushed me in that direction.  And it's a great change!

Another thing that I am hoping is a life-long change:  I found out yesterday late afternoon that one of the ladies I visit teach is having a busy medical week.  Before, I probably would have thought "Well, I would sure love to help, but I won't be able to do it.  Hope it goes ok."  But, this time, having had a visual example of others who have served me so faithfully (especially my faithful, WONDERFUL visiting teachers) I thought, "OK, I have chemo on Wed.  Is there a way I can help her?"  And I kept thinking until I found a way to get dinner to her.  I am hoping this will change me, forever, and make me better at serving others.

(And I hope no one in my Stake or Ward in leadership positions ever reads this, 'cause I'm happy with the callings I have, and I'm not looking for anything else, thank you very much.  Just don't want to give them any bright ideas!)