Tuesday, March 10th

When I was growing up, my mom always told me that the world didn't revolve around me.  (I really didn't understand what she meant by that . . .)  Well, I just found out that she was wrong.  It does!  At least it does in my house, though not in the way she meant.

Yesterday was a frustrating day.  It was busy, and all the late nights and early mornings and daylight saving time all compounded and caught up to me.  That means all the "little things" that shouldn't have been a big deal were "big things."  I was frustrated and exhausted.  Nearly in meltdown, I went to bed early.  In my exhaustion, I forgot to set my alarm.

Well, you know the rest of that story.  I woke up this morning 5 minutes too late for my kids to catch their bus.  Not 5 minutes later than usual . . . 5 minutes after the bus had gone by.  None of my kid's alarms had rung, either, as luck would have it, and they were ALL still asleep, as was my husband.  We rushed to get everyone ready, and they made it to school (on time, even!) but if I ever think that I'm not needed, all I need to do is just pull a stunt like that or try to "take a day off" and go somewhere!

I think it's probably ok to post this next part now, because I think the only people who read this blog are probably my family anyway---I've been trying to respect the privacy of others by letting them tell their own news and not spreading it around . . .  A week ago, we found out that my dad has prostate cancer.  The Dr. thinks---and we hope and pray---that it is still pretty early.  Prostate cancer is a slow-growing cancer--thus chemo is not an appropriate treatment.  His treatment options are:  1.  Surgery  2.  Radiation  3.  Hormone Therapy  4.  Do nothing.  Surgery is the preferred treatment option, especially if it is early enough that it hasn't spread beyond the prostate.  If it has, they will need to follow up with radiation to try to kill it.  Hormone therapy doesn't "kill" the cancer, but it slows it's spread.  It isn't a good option for anyone that wishes to live a long time more.  And doing nothing means the cancer would keep growing---albeit slowly---until it spread through the body and took the man's life.

They can't do the surgery until 6 weeks after the biopsy, because of risk of infection.  So, Dad is scheduled for surgery next month.  We will know a lot more then, after they get in there and see exactly how far it has spread.

Yesterday afternoon I was talking with the sweet lady who was my visiting teacher while I was going through chemo.  (She has since been moved to a different route.  :-(   )  She substitute teaches in seminary sometimes, and she was telling me about a conversation they had in class the other day.  My oldest son was in the class, and they were talking about trials and looking for the good.  She told me some of the things she had talked about, and some of the comments my son had made.  One of the comments he made was that the trials you have prepare you for things that happen later in your life--including other trials later.  I know he was referring to the news that my dad has cancer---he really loves and respects his grandpa.

I think about how traumatic the whole idea of cancer was for all of us a year ago, and I look at how we are handling my dad's now, and I realize that we all really HAVE grown. We worry, of course, and we pray, but we aren't totally freaked out like we would have been a year ago--we are handling it.  We know and understand that Heavenly Father has a plan for all of us.  Death is part of that plan, and while we hope and pray that LIFE will be the outcome, we know that even if it doesn't turn out that way, it will be o.k.

I found out on Sunday that a lady I know that lives here passed away.  She was a real fighter---she had cancer 3 times, and also had a bout of septic shock that she survived.  I ran into her in the grocery store in Idaho Falls last fall when I was out doing radiation.  At that time, she had just found out that her cancer had returned---we were joking around about hair---my lack thereof and her barely-hanging-on-hair.  At that point, she was trying to keep it as long as she could.  She was a good lady; she showed me how to stick with it in the midst of adversity.  I'm sad that she's gone---but I'm so glad that she doesn't have to suffer anymore.  I hope and pray that her family will find peace at this time.

Well, my little boy is poking me with a toy bow and arrow--he wants me to help him shoot it, so I guess I better get going.  Break's over!  Like I said, it feels like the world does revolve around me in this house!